[Notes on this entry: I've been working on this for maybe a week or so, in the middle of getting settled into our newlywed life and our apartment, which is why it has taken so long! This entry is also very long, as my goal was to capture as many memories as I could while they are still somewhat fresh in my head. You've been warned about length! At least there are pictures to punctuate the text. :-) And sorry if it is all jumbly in places, it's a bunch of pieced together memories, trying to describe one significant and wonderful day of transition in my life, but hopefully in the end you'll get a feel for what it was like for me! This post covers the days leading up to our wedding and the day of - more posts to come later about the honeymoon, our move, and our new life!]
In short, I really couldn’t have asked for much more as far as the wedding goes. It was (is) our favorite topic of conversation for days and even weeks afterward. Unfortunately, writing about it almost a month later I have probably lost some of the little moments, but my goal in writing it now is to get as many of them as possible while they’re in my head.
I am not exactly sure where I left off with the blogging, but the weekend before the wedding and the first couple days of that week felt like a frenzy of last minute printing, gathering, packing, organizing, and constant call-making about details that had to be set. Somehow we got through to Wednesday, which was the day my mom and I drove over to the wedding location to set up shop in our little rented house(/cottage) and settle in before all the other wedding stuff started. We were pleasantly surprised by the house – I’d picked it out because it was so close to the chapel (closer than any other hotel except a rather expensive one) and we’d have the kitchen and space for getting ready. It was very rainy that day, but my mom and I carefully unloaded all the goods into the house, especially the dress – getting it inside was quite the operation. Then, we had to figure out where to hang it up – we opted for the windows right behind the TV, which meant the TV had to be moved, but we had our priorities, so the dress went front and center. We then proceeded to spend far too much time trying to get the dress to lay just so and wrinkle only minimally, until finally we were both satisfied. We then went out to a little store in town which turned out to be nothing like a big grocery store, but we got enough to get us through the evening.
The back of my mom's car full of wedding stuff
The dress hanging in its place of honor
That Wednesday night was quiet, and I knew it was a prelude to much hustle and bustle to come, but my mom and I were the only ones there at that point, and it was nice to actually have gotten there, and weirdly enough, it was nice not to have the internet, even though I felt a need to check things for the wedding a bit. It was just nice and quiet and my mom and I got to share some quality time together.
Before I continue on with Thursday, I wanted to reflect on how, in the end everything went great, but there were at least a few (what felt like) legitimate problems down to the wire that had me stressed right before the wedding. For one, without going into too much detail, we'd had the understanding from the start that we could have a plated dinner at our venue. At a meeting about ten days before, our caterer told Dave and I that it would have to be a buffet because of the limited kitchen. We didn't really manage to hide the surprise/disappointment that we felt, especially after having asked the guests what they wanted to eat on the invitations. Not to mention, suddenly I no longer could grasp exactly how we would take care of the vegetarians and make sure they had plenty to eat, which was important to me. Anyway, long story short, about two days before the wedding the caterer told me that they were going to do plated meals after all, because she could tell that we really hadn't been informed, and she wanted to make it right. Talk about suspense! As it turned out, the meals did take a while to arrive at all the tables, but I appreciated the hard work the catering staff did to get the meals out.
The other crisis was somewhat more upsetting I suppose - we'd done enough (or so we thought) to make sure our wedding bands were safely in before the wedding, but that went down to the wire as well. After being assured they'd be in a week before the wedding, I called, and no, they weren't in - and to make matters worse I was talking to someone who didn't really know our case, rather than a manager who did. It was due to mistakes with engraving I think, but it upset us especially because Dave was very clear when we ordered them that the MOST important thing was to have them at the wedding - we'd get them engraved later if necessary. They assured us that there would be enough time, and so we (somewhat hesitantly) went ahead. Flash forward to the week before the wedding, and there were no bands in our hands. Finally after speaking with a manager again, my mom and I were able to pick them up on our way to the wedding location. I was so glad to have them in hand by that point.
It sounds like I am rehashing right now - but really I am just writing down these crises and reflecting how everything worked out, and in light of the actual wedding, those are things that don't bother me anymore - it all turned out fine.
So, back to chronology. On Thursday, my mom and I awoke and got ready and I started making a few calls and gathering some things. Early in the afternoon my grandparents and their friend Chris (who I've gotten to know over the years) stopped by to say hello and regale us with stories of their time in New York City, which was nice. Meanwhile I was starting to work on the out of town guest bags to deliver to hotels. Eventually they left, and my mom and I ran a couple errands before heading up to the hotel where a bunch of our guests were staying. Lo and behold, when we arrived we saw some of our Samoan relatives walking into the hotel! It was so nice to see them - as is most likely obvious, Samoa is very far away. To have them there having traveled from Samoa and Hawai'i was such a blessing - and a fun mirror to the trip my mom and I took last summer to go to our cousin Josie's wedding in Samoa. I was also pumped to see my lovely and beautiful flower girl Trinity - newly turned five and fresh off a visit to Disneyland. I could go on and on about how great she is, but suffice it to say having her as the flower girl was another blessing of our wedding day!
We hung out in the hotel lobby a bit, greeting guests and saying hello, and then my mom and I went to use the internet in our relatives' room for a little bit of wedding business. Eventually I heard from a group of my girlfriends that they'd arrived at the hotel, so I went down to the lobby to find them. It was such a rush to come down and see my Samoan relatives sitting at one table, and many of my dear college friends at another! There was requisite squealing and delight, and then I introduced each group to the other, and we all amassed at one table and chatted. Talk about a type of wonderful gathering that only a wedding could create! It was also at this point that Trinity made friends with my friends - a trend to continue all weekend.
I forget the exact order things happened before dinner on Thursday, but I got wedding supplies to have my girlfriends help me assemble out of town bags - a job at which they performed amazingly, of course. I ran around doing some other things and talking to my mom too, I think. At some point, Kristin, Kevin, and Allie arrived (the last of the Thursday arrivals) and it was so good to see them! Then the 8 of us from Georgetown who'd arrived by that point went out to dinner together, something that I'm so glad I got to do. We'd only graduated three weeks before, but I missed all those people so much - and it was a great treat to spend that time with them as part of the wedding weekend.
After dinner, we went back to the hotel and I spent time with my friends and with Trinity and some time with both - which I really just relished and soaked up. (By the way, I love all of my relatives, but at 5 years old, Trinity is just the star of my affection, as she is for her parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, etc - so please forgive me centering on her so much, haha!) I had hoped to see Dave that night when he arrived at the hotel, but alas, a GPS inconsistency got him on the wrong path (as it did many guests, apparently) and he was later than expected. So my mom and I headed back to the cottage and settled in before the busy next day - Friday!
First thing on Friday, my wonderful MOH Kristin and I got to spend some time together, getting manicures at the salon. I'd hoped to have a larger group of my bridesmaids do that together, but between girls arriving on different days, sleep-deprived and needing to rest, it worked out differently. But Kristin and I had a good time at the salon, though I remember being stressed about some things, like having to move our counseling appointment (yes, the day before the wedding) - but that worked out really better in the end, so yay! After our manicures were done, I went back to the cottage, I think with Kristin, and then at some point she left, but I don't even remember how... wow [Edit: I just remembered that Kristin drove her own car that morning, it was the NEXT morning that my dad went to pick her up... glad I got that resolved haha]. Anyway, by that point, Dave was there, hooray! I hadn't seen him in a couple days, but obviously it was wonderful to be reunited and attempt to process that we were getting married the next day!
After a while, we got ready to head out to a rather random but exciting opportunity that had come our way. Basically, we were contacted by the public affairs people at our wedding site because our wedding date was actually the 100 year anniversary of the chapel. They had a celebration the day before (Friday) and they'd gotten the show Cake Boss to participate and build a cake in the form of the chapel! They wanted three couples married in the chapel to participate, and had one couple married 30 years ago, one married about 15 years ago, and then us (at that time to be married there the next day!). We hadn't gotten the most up to date information on it, but we showed up and quickly learned that yes, we were going to get shot for television. At that point I was very glad I was wearing a nice dress, had taken the time to do nice make up, AND got my hair blown out at the salon that morning - definitely worked out! So we were told where to go, and what to do, and NOT to look at the camera, and we did our thing, then hung around for the part where Buddy and his crew showed up with the cake, and it was unveiled, and the crowd oohed and ahhed and clapped. After they shot the cake and Buddy's arrival for the episode and did "beauty shots" of the cake, us three couples got to ceremonially cut the cake with Buddy! Then we got to taste some of the sheet cake they were handing out to the crowd, and it was generally a good time. It was such an unexpected random chance to participate in something fun. We were afraid it would stress us out the day before the wedding, but it actually turned out to be just fine. We're not sure exactly when the episode will air, but ballpark we think it should be on in October!
So anyway, after that fun little experience, we headed down to our last counseling appointment. Yes, it was the day before the wedding, but with our long distance relationship it was necessary to squeeze it in. It was nice to take a little moment to talk about our relationship again (and finalize details with the chaplain, haha). After that we met up with some friends from our hometown who had just arrived, and made our way to the reception site to meet up with people and do some set up. There was a miscommunication/we were late from our counseling appointment, so there was a delay getting into the site, but that resolved itself, and my friends/helpers showed up, and we set about doing the set up we could. It was amazing, the one task I thought would take a while, I told people what to do, and in a flash it was done - we are blessed with amazing and helpful friends. Since it was done so quickly we had some time to chill, so we sat around in the site and relished the time with our friends. That was one of the unscripted moments of the weekend that I just really love to look back on. Simple, quiet, with the people who traveled all that way and came to help us out and celebrate with us. Dave got everyone some pizza and that made it even better. :-)
Dave and me eating, go figure!
A nicely posed photo in the lodge
Hanging out with our wonderful people (though everyone in this photo is a college friend of mine)
Eventually, it was time to pack up in the lodge and make our way to our rehearsal! Thankfully, most everyone was there on time (and we had a stand in available for one groomsman who was running late arriving from his long road trip). It was crazy to see all our close friends and family amassed to practice being in our ceremony, and very exciting as well! Our chaplain basically ran the rehearsal, I got some of my questions answered, and things went smoothly. As this part of the weekend hit, most of the people who were in the wedding were there, actually amassing, and we were really practicing, for our wedding THE NEXT DAY! I don't think I fully processed it, but I was definitely having fun and I was very excited.
After the rehearsal we headed to the rehearsal dinner, where we saw even MORE people (dinner invitees who weren't at the rehearsal), and we mingled, and Dave got me a drink, and eventually we sat, and talked, and mingled some more, and it was generally a great time. It was during the rehearsal dinner that we noticed our single friends from our respective colleges had pulled two tables together to form one larger group. "Intriguing..." we thought. Mostly it was fun to know our friends were getting to meet each other! The people that each of us had either gotten to know at school, or gotten to know on visits to the other one's school, were blending. Also, Trinity was there as the flower girl of course, and she was remarkable. She's 5, the next oldest person was 17, but she held her own like a champ and mingled like everyone else. I love her so much! And the giant coloring book I gave to her as a present at the beginning of the dinner helped to keep her occupied too.
At a certain point during the dinner, Dave and I tried to give a toast, and while I knew it might be emotional, I had no idea how quickly I would get teary - I barely got a sentence out! Luckily when it was hard for me to say much more about how much it meant that everyone was there, Dave took over and finished out the toast thanking all of our loved ones. It was a good moment for sure. Eventually older guests (and Trinity) started to leave, we got a chance to hang out a bit more with the college age set, but it was time to return to our lodging places for our last night as unmarried people!
Teary eyed while Dave finishes our speech
A shot of part of our crowd - with my bro-in-law being silly!
Me with my love - Trinity
(but yes, my husband is REALLY my love)
A shot of the table where our college worlds collided!
It was fun for me that the lovely Ann stayed in the same room as me the night before my wedding - it was a fun little girly sleepover, but it was still pretty chill, and I loved getting to share my excitement with her. That leads into sleeping that night... and waking up SUPER early the next morning (before 5 am I believe). I tried, and tried, and tried, to go back to sleep, but to no avail. I was up! Much as I knew I might be tired later, I was just too darn excited and amped up to go back to sleep. So somehow, I waited for everyone else to get up and the day to start. And I might have woken my almost-husband with a text message. Oops.
At some point, my dad went to get Kristin at the hotel and Ann and I went off to the salon - Ann for nails and me for hair. Kristin met up with us when my dad dropped her off. The salon appointment was very nice - having had a "hair trial" about a week before the wedding, I knew the the stylist and I were in agreement about what it should look like. What made me nervous was the sprinkling rain outside! And then the fact that, when Ann returned from getting the umbrella from the car for me, it was sopping wet... because it was POURING outside! My thought process went something like "oh no, oh no... let it go, maybe it will clear up, you can't control it, don't stress." But I was a little on edge. So, eventually our hair was done, the three of us went out to the car (in what had luckily returned to sprinkling precipitation) and returned to the cottage, where my other two bridesmaids and Trinity and her mom Alice had appeared! And from then on it was get ready time! I promptly made sure there was champagne available for me (and others) in an attempt to stop thinking about the weather. I also started in on my make up, which I was doing myself (with the aid of some fancy make up and a consultation I had done in April). Luckily, I still had about a full hour allotted, so it wasn't a huge issue when my false lashes were being a bit difficult. Things were a little hectic, but manageable, and in the midst of it all, I was trying to enjoy the company of all the girls! And my dad, who was trying to stay out of the way as much as possible.
Around noon I got antsy for the flowers and the photographer to show up, and almost had my mom calling them (well I did have her calling the photographer, there was confusion over where Dave was etc) but before long the flowers showed up and they were GORGEOUS and it felt so good to see them, and my florist, and know that things were working like they were supposed to. We oohed and ahhed and then continued to get ready. I was waiting for the photographer to arrive to actually get in the dress, so I got everything else ready. I think - I'm not really sure! She arrived, I was happy, she took some detail shots, and then it was time. Time for everyone to gather while I became a bride! I got the dress on, people oohed and ahhed, and my mom started in on corseting me. I was mildly anxious about time but tried to relax. My dad was mentioning the target departure time for me, yet assuring me he was not worried about time. Eventually I was all laced up, and Kristin my dad and I formed the first little trip over to the chapel. I hauled myself into the back seat along with my dress and veil. It was not super comfortable - being laced in that tight, and trying to keep my hair off the seat - but it was tolerable! I was going to get married! And things were running on time. It was good.
When we went through security, there was a funny moment. The guard asked where we were headed, my dad said the chapel, and the guard looked at me in the back seat and said "I believe you." Oh, wedding day chuckles. When we arrived, some of our early-arriving guests were there and got to see me, but I guess that was their reward for getting there so early. Good for them! To my pleasant surprise, we were ushered in by two ladies who worked at the chapel who showed us to a room downstairs where I could wait, complete with a nice mirror, some chairs, and a couch. I also got to get a last minute request into the organist (for the processional song) - something I wasn't sure if I'd get to do. What happened exactly next is a blur of the order, but Kristin and I got my veil on, almost had a teary moment and had to force ourselves to stop being sentimental, guests accidentally happened upon me looking for the bathroom. At one point Kristin went upstairs to make sure the other bridesmaids would know where we were, and I had a moment to myself in the room.
That moment was really special and something I hope I always remember. I was alone, in the room. The ceremony was 15 maybe 20 minutes away. I could hear people's voices very clearly. I heard Kristin, I heard Molly telling people to "ush" - I heard the bridesmaids and Trinity when they arrived. And then I heard Dave, and I knew he was up there. I could hear the hubbub, but I was removed from it. It was really happening - our wedding. I was there, I was in the dress, the hair, the make up, the accessories, the veil. I just looked at myself and took it all in, and had a little moment. It was really nice. Before too long, other bridesmaids came down and I got my bouquet, and then it was time to go upstairs! They'd made sure Dave was out of sight and hid me in a little walled off area at the back, my bridesmaids gathered around. Someone pulled the veil over my face and we all had *another* moment. My dad came, saw me, started to talk, and got choked up. Then the music started, and the bridesmaids lined up, and it was just him and me back there. And then the ladies said it was time, so we exited and stopped at the head of the aisle.
And I saw him, and the rest of the guests. They were far away (we had a looooong aisle) but they were there, and this was it, and I was the bride! I choked up as that moment hit, and thought I would cry down the aisle, but that faded, and I just beamed - and shook too, from emotion, but mostly I was smiling and almost laughing at how big the moment felt and how much emotion was inside me. We reached the guests and I saw the faces - I think I saw Kristen crying - other people were crying too - at me! at us! It was our big moment. My dad and I got to the end of the aisle, and Dave came forward too fast. Oops! Our chaplain said opening words, and then my dad handed me off. He started to pull the veil back down over my face but I was like no! Haha whoops. The ceremony started - I looked at Dave - it was powerful. I tried to take it all in but also tried to say the right things and not mess up. Each part passed as I knew it would. The moment where I got to take it in the most was during the reading we gave my mother - a secular poem called "Union" by Robert Fulghum. I picked it because I loved its sentiment - and it was rife with emotion right there, with my mother reading it to us and our guests. Because she was reading, I looked around - at her, at our guests, and at David. I tried to think about the words, and in thinking about them the emotion got to me - but I'm glad that I felt that during the ceremony.
Dave and I went to light the unity candle - I focused on not tripping or blowing out our candle after we lit it, using the tips our chaplain gave us at rehearsal. We said vows and slipped rings on each other's fingers. I tried to say the right words but also to mean them and say them loudly and clearly. Then, it was time to kiss, so we did. Then we faced everyone, and the chaplain said we were married! Wow, it went by fast! What a rush. We exited on down the aisle and hid ourselves to do our quick change - Dave put on his saber and two of my bridesmaids bustled my dress - thanks ladies! I tried to do the "hey we're married!" thing, but he was focused on his change. Oh well. Eventually, the crowd was outside, the sabers were arched, and we got to walk through! It was so fun, and a moment I'd looked forward to for a long time. We kissed to pass through the last sabers, and Todd tapped me on the rear and said "Welcome to the Army, Ma'am." Just like I'd read about, happening to me. We exited the arch and... stopped. And everyone was looking at us. The choreographed part was over, and now we were all standing there! Uhhh.... so eventually I said "We'll see you all at the lodge, we're looking forward to it!" And my dad said something like "Drinks are on me!" and people chuckled. But really, they were! Eventually the crowd started to disperse, and we saw the guests for the next wedding. They saw us and they clapped! People are so nice on your wedding day.
Dave and I hopped in the car to head down to the photo location, and there we met up with the photographers. They were so great during the portrait process, just getting the people who were there done and out of the way so they could head back up to the cocktail hour. We stood and smiled and stood, and it was lovely. I forgot to mention - the weather had cleared up! And it was perfect for doing photos - I felt blessed.
We moved onto wedding party and we had fun with the girls and guys, posing and such. I gave my girls some good hugs while the guys were being photographed. PS. To my lovely elves - thank you for informing two of the groomsmen that they should, in fact, be down at the photo location due to their positions in the wedding party, rather than up at the cocktail hour quite that early. It apparently had not been communicated to them previously, but you saved the day - you rock! What's even better is I didn't even know that happened until a few days ago (and the wedding happened about a month ago).
Eventually we got everyone else to leave and Jade and Tim photographed just the two of us - which was fun! We got all kissy and lovey and followed their instructions for how to pose and look and be. Jade and Tim kept assuring us that we were doing GREAT on time, and that was nice as well. Eventually we wrapped up and headed back up to the lodge. We walked past a group of tourists - they clapped for us too. :-) And then we took a quick alone moment, and we hugged, and said "We're married!"
JUST Married
Saber Arch
Our wonderful wedding party (and all my aesthetic decisions coming together in one photo!)
We got up to the lodge, and Dave had to park far away because the spot that was being saved for us got taken. Luckily we had plenty of time, I switched out of my veil and into my hair flower, we talked a little, and got ready for introductions. I heard and saw our DJs for the first time, and saw the reception site - all set up with my instructions and vision, but done without me - it was fun to see what my elves and the staff had put together, and I'm so grateful for them all! We got introduced after our parents and bridal party, and did our first dance right away. Though dance lessons got lost in the hectic pre-wedding shuffle, Dave managed to whisper that we should do a twirl and a dip, which we did to much applause. It was fun - and I soaked in the romance of the moment.
First dancing
There were phases in the rest of the reception - greetings, shoving food into our faces, dancing before dinner, dancing after dinner, hopping around to all the tables, getting told I looked beautiful. Those things blend together, but boy, it was fun, and it was so special and happy to see and feel all those people there celebrating with us. It sounds corny, but it really was just amazing. Not to mention the DJs did a great job running the schedule so I wasn't worried about events - I just did what I was told when it was time for things to happen. I do remember the toasts. My brother in law was short, funny, and sweet. My maid of honor roasted me a little bit, but it was totally fair - she knows me so well and that was clear in her toast - which was funny, even if she was making fun of me! :-) My father ragged on the Navy-Army rivalry but said some very sweet things about Dave, and my father-in-law was also very sweet and heartfelt. Cutting the cake was fun - and my dad talked about the Navy sword we were borrowing for that purpose - the one that used to be my grandfather's, passed down to my father. It was a great way to share the dual branch military history, and honor my grandfather, who died when I was three. I know it meant a lot to my dad and it meant a lot to me as well. Dave even did a fancy salute, which thoroughly impressed the crowd.
The rest of the night was a blend of talking to people, dancing as much as humanly possible, and taking a few more pictures. Our DJs were downright amazing. They had so many people up on the floor all night! It was really wonderful. Dave also had the grand idea to dance up on a bench, elevated above the rest of the crowd, which was fun. We just tried to live up every moment, and I think we really did. Eventually it had to end - which I knew would happen soon enough. We cleaned up enough and packed things up in cars, and I said some tearful good-byes to friends who I'd spent years with and were now really really going off to do their own things. But I was still happy - very very happy and feeling so blessed with how everything had gone. Eventually Dave and I got in the car and drove to our bed and breakfast - and lo and behold, there was a thunderstorm in the distance. We really lucked out, weather-wise. We got to the B&B and our room, which was a welcome relief, and as Dave helped me pull (seemingly) millions of bobby pins out of my hair, I realized that all day, I had not felt tired, my feet didn't really hurt, and (this is the weirdest one) I didn't go to the bathroom at ALL while wearing my wedding dress! To Dave that meant "wow, you must have been super dehydrated" - and yes that was probably true - but I felt to a certain extent as though my basic bodily needs were somehow pushed to a lower priority for the day, and I was just running on a mix of adrenaline and love and excitement. I did start to feel tired and I used the bathroom at the B&B, but only then. It was a crazy thing to realize!
So I went to sleep, in a big comfy bed, with my husband, done with our (wonderful) wedding, thinking about our honeymoon, and the rest of marriage after that. It was a crazy place to be, but overall I just felt so grateful for the day I had just lived.
My view at the reception (with BIL being silly again haha)
And in closing, a few shots attempting to convey the fun of our wedding dance party:
